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Thursday, 25 April 2019

Empowering Your Marriage with Uncommon Freedom

Empowering Your Marriage with Uncommon Freedom

Empowering Your Marriage with Uncommon Freedom

Giving uncommon freedom to your spouse has the potential to open a whole new level of adventure and discovery in your marriage. When you allow your spouse to be all that he or she can be in this world, you will find levels of creative expression within them that will introduce a constant state of newness within your relationship. Giving uncommon freedom is the activity of allowing your spouse more freedom than traditionally expected.
The fact of the matter is that we never really get to know our partners because we are constantly, either knowingly or unknowingly, attempting to keep them in bondage in order to tame our fears of losing them. Unfortunately, we have trouble in paradise. No one really wants to be smothered in a relationship. The more freedom that we give our spouses, the more interesting our marriage becomes. By freedom, I mean that you refuse to stand in the way of your spouse's dreams and aspirations. Instead you do all you can to encourage your wife or husband's personal dreams and visions.
Reasons Marriages Fall Apart
Tens of thousands of marriages fall apart because of the lack of freedom to be. When you hound your spouse because of her desire to go back to school, to join a cause or movement, to travel with friends across the nation, you destroy that inner freedom that been given as a gift from God to every living creature.
Quarrels, boredom, and frustration with the state of the marriage often happen because the growth of the marriage has become stagnant. Sameness in daily routines, rolls and responsibilities, interactions and communications can take intimacy and romance right out of a marriage. But newness creates the opposite effect by enabling us to see the one we love in a new light in term of charm and personality. This reoccurring newness continues to ignite the romantic flames of a relationship year after year. One of the most important things to remember is that a marriage must be earned beyond the formal ceremony. In fact, the wedding ceremony is just the beginning of a life long journey of growth and discovery in which couples should see each other as unfinished vessels of wonders.
Unlocking Your Spouses Potential
Days, weeks, months and years of dedication should be for the purpose of bringing out the chief qualities and traits that form character and maturity and inspire creative expressiveness within a person. A good marriage is not just about the individual; it is about the other person and the growth that is possible for him or her. Marriages that I have studied over the years, including my own, have been about making the other person feel a sense of joy and freedom. When this occurs, everyday can feel like the first day of your engagement to one another. Things remain new because you are constantly unlocking potential within the other person that has been dormant for years. This is how couples find new aspirations and dreams within themselves. Many find themselves passionate about things they had once hated.
For example, by giving and encouraging uncommon freedom within your spouse, you might awaken within him or her a passion to open up a business, stand up for a cause such as domestic violence or become a leader within community or even run for political office, something she would have never had the courage to do while feeling a sense of bondage and obligation to you and your desires on a constant basis.
Essence of Freedom
Giving your spouse uncommon freedom includes giving him or her freedom to do many things, such as pursue a career that she loves, adopt children, create quality relationships, male or female, travel alone for "me time" ,live apart for long lengths of time if necessary. Many couples have jobs that require them to live apart for years. I know a couple who lived apart due to the demands of their careers. They only saw each other once or year for a month or two. Yet because they kept the rituals of romance in operation from afar (sending love letters, writing poems, and expressing term of endearment) the love was stronger than ever whenever they reunited.
I am not saying that every marriage should be like this couple's, but such marriage, in order to work, must contain the highest levels of trust. I and my wife once lived in different states for nearly a decade before we resided in a permanent place together. At times it wasn't easy to be apart, but the emotional investment was well worth it all. While away from one another, our passion for one another continued to grow in intensity. Each time we met it was like meeting a whole new person. The growth in character and personality was tremendous. Even to this day, our goal is to keep the fire burning by allowing freedom to triumph in our marriage.
True Love is Uncommon Freedom
In order to allow uncommon freedom to become a ritual within your marriage, you must adopt an attitude of high trust. You must believe in the person you love to the point of allowing freedom to rein in their hearts, minds and souls. True love is freedom in its purest form. Love with attachments or demands are always unstable and lead to various degrees of anxiety and uncertainty. Therefore, the love that is within us must grow toward freedom if it is to be highly influential in another person's life. True love wins regardless of the outcome.
The Biggest Fear in a Marriage
One of the biggest fears in the majority of marriages is that one spouse is going to be unfaithful while the other is not watching. That is the reason a husband or wife wonders why his or her spouse doesn't return straight home after work. This is the reason a wife worries about the activities of her husband when he is alone with his friends. The fear of unfaithfulness is the reason why one spouse may hire a private investigator to attempt to catch the other red handed.
However, these control tactics usually have the opposite effects. They build distrust in the marriage. A sense of bondage rears its head and freedom goes out the back door. Newness dies. Stagnation appears and couples stop discovering one another. Unfaithfulness becomes a real possibility. This is the unfortunate path that most marriages take.
Experiencing the Highest Freedom
The highest freedom is willing to lose in order to gain. It takes the utmost courage. When we make the decision to give uncommon freedom to our spouses, we accept that there is a possibility that our husband or wife may choose to leave us. But this is the potential sacrifice of the greatest love. We give the people we love the freedom to exit out of the door of our lives if they choose to. We have no authority or dominion over the choices of others. Only God does. But the highest love within us, which is God, has a way of keeping the person of its beneficiary within close proximity of our lives, forever.
Those who stray away from this kind of love usually find their way back into our lives rather quickly and if they choose not to return, they usually feel the regret of their decision for a life time. The gift of uncommon freedom contains such power. Therefore, starting today, let's embrace the spirit of freedom within our marriage; life is short but uncommon freedom, which is the highest love, is eternal.

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